The time when I truly comprehend the meaning behind the phrase ‘Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder’.
“I don’t think she’s pretty,” my roommate, Dieb commented as she watched ‘Mean Girls’; referring to Amanda Seyfried.
“Hey, why not?!” I totally disagree with her. To me, Amanda Seyfried is one of the prettiest women I’ve ever seen.
“Maybe it’s because she’s blonde. That’s what made people think she’s pretty. There’s something about her eyes that makes her look less appealing,”
Her eyes is the feature that makes her pretty! Why do people find her large eyes unattractive? Why did my roommate find her eyes unattractive?
I could tolerate it if we were arguing whether Lindsay Lohan is pretty or not (not really, in my opinion). Or even Oprah Winfrey (people don’t really perceive her as being pretty but rather, attractive).
Yes, that’s it! Pretty and attractiveness, both are almost similar yet different. A pretty lady might not necessarily be attractive. Another not-so-pretty lady might have the higher degree of attractiveness that emanates out from within her mediocre looks. But we shall get to that later (Part 2, maybe?)
Now, let’s discuss about the phrase ‘Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder’. What’s a beholder? The seer.
That's what Mr. Rochester said to the plain Jane Eyre, whom, in his opinion, is far more attractive than the snobbish oh-so-beautiful Blanche Ingram.
Let’s face it, each and every one of us has our own criteria that define whether that person is beautiful or not. If she lacks any of those qualities, or if she doesn’t possess any of it, that’s it, she is not eligible to be labeled as a pretty person. This whole statement is harsh all right, but let’s be honest, shall we? Don’t tell me you don’t have those criteria in your mind.
Bear in mind that everyone’s criteria of ‘to determine whether that person is beautiful or not’ is different.
Most often that the criteria is based on their own interpretation of beauty, or are influenced by the one figure that they feel is pretty. That person could be a world famous actress, their own mother, sister, teacher or friend.
For example, Person A who had always feel that Song Hye Gyo being the person who has all the qualities of ‘being beautiful’ might look at others who possess oriental, Korean/Chinese/Japanese-like looks, albeit the nose is flat or prominent, albeit the teeth is crooked or not, as pretty. And thus, yes, the person who doesn’t realize she is being scrutinized and judged by Person A made it into the ‘Beauty list!’
On the other hand, if Person A sees someone with a bit of Aishwarya Rai-like look; no matter how delicately structured her nose is, no matter how big and attractive her eyes are, no matter how thick her lashes are, would say ‘She’s not that pretty to me!’ .
Quite contrarily, Person B who had always watched a lot of Hindustan dramas would perceive those who has the slightest Aishwarya Rai feature as very pretty and seeing others with Oriental looks as ‘Okay la, not that pretty to me,’.
In short, our judgment on whether that person is pretty or not is clouded by our own definition and interpretation of beauty. Thank God for that. Imagine if the criteria of being beautiful is firmly defined with no changes made, I repeat, absolutely no changes made just like Stoke’s Law of Diffusion. It is getting worse if every person has a firm, unchanging belief towards that ‘Law of Beauty’.
The world would be in chaos and those who do not possess any of those qualities would remain alone and single until their old age, with 20 cats as companions. Everyone would want that person with thick lashes, white skin, above 160 cm of height, dimpled cheeks as their lifetime companion. How on earth is each of us going to find that particular person who meets all (at least, any of) the defined criteria?
Have mercy to those with dark but healthy skin, slanted eyes, chubby figures and flat noses!
That is why, Alhamdulillah, God has made each of us different, made us have our own definition of beauty.
That’s where you see the skinny man married the plus-sized woman, the Caucasian American found his other soul in the form of an African woman and many others.
So if you feel that you’re not pretty, you’re wrong! God had created each one of us with the best of functions and appearances. We are the best of all creatures. It’s just that different people have different interpretation of beauty. Out of Person A, Person B, Person C, maybe only one of them will find you pretty. We can't please everyone, anyway. Even in terms of looks.
Bear in mind that your one, true soulmate will find you beautiful, regardless of how chubby your figure is (he might find it cute and huggable! :D), how flat your nose is (he likes it as he feels prominent nose is too urmm…pointy?), and many others (I don’t know la how men’s minds work).Next time, I'm going to talk about inner beauty, which is the true, everlasting beauty.
Be grateful with the way you are. I know I do, Alhamdulillah.
And remember! Your Rabb caused to be declared (publicly): ‘If you are grateful, I will add more (favors) unto you; but if you show ingratitude, truly My punishment is terrible indeed.’” (Qur’an 14:7)
Yes, if you stop complaining about how you look and be grateful with the way you are now, then Allah will give more blessings to you in terms of maybe 'less acne on your face', or 'less wrinkles' or even 'radiance that exudes out from your visage although you do not wear SKII, LOL'.
Besides, it's no use of wanting to have Naomi Watt's looks as naturally, we are from different parents and heritages, kan? Be proud of the way you look, for your physical appearance now is some sort of combination from your parents', grandparents', uncles, aunties', ancestors' looks! So you're unique!!! We are all unique!
As for me, one important criteria that could change people’s looks from Ugly Betty (no, she is really cute to me. How could people says she’s UGLY??) okay, from grumpy Uncle Scrooge to Prince Eric from Little Mermaid (my favourite Disney prince) is….
Smile is the cheapest way to improve your looks.
My Ustaz had once said “Orang takde gigi pun, kalau senyum nampak comel je,”
So, no matter how so breathtakingly beautiful people said about that particular woman, if she looks so arrogant, and couldn’t even offer a slight bit of smile to the people she met (and knows)- orang kata, ‘muka sombong’. Then sorry, she’s not in my ‘Beautiful People’ list.
That’s why I tend to smile a lot. To improve my looks. AHAKS…
Madam Jagdish was my Level 6 English Teacher for the 1st semester 1styear in CFS. So, after the semester was over, I hardly saw her anymore.
Until…. the 2nd semester of the 2nd year in CFS (one and a half year later), where I stumbled upon her in the café.
I greeted her and she was pleasantly surprised to see me and we chatted for quite a while. A few moments later, I asked her to make sure of something;
“Madam, do you still remember me?”
She smiled and said “Of course! I remember your smile,”
Wahhhh. That’s even better! She didn’t remember my name but she remembers my smile!!!
So people, smile a lot okay! (But be careful not to smile too much to the members of the opposite genders as this might create misunderstandings if you know what I mean).
P.S. Amanda Seyfried IS pretty, am I right????
What? She's not pretty to you? Fine, fine. We have different definitions of beauty then. She made it into my 'beautiful people' list though. :P
With that, may peace be upon you!
I want to grow old gracefully. Amin. :)