Lost

 I lost my way. 

I first started the journey by knowing 'what am I here for', 'why am I living this life',

but somehow, in the midst of the journey, I got lost. 

I asked myself 'what do I intend to do after this?' , 'what am I doing?' 

I tend to visualize what will happen in the future, those visions often being optimistic and so great up to the extent that they are not that relevant or realistic anymore.

And I got scared. What will happen to me? What if all the things I planned do not go exactly as I wanted?

I got the answer "Allah knows best. If it doesn't happen, then it is not the best for you". Well, that makes me calm. 

But I later realized that what leads to me feeling this way -this feeling of hopelessness, lost, etc actually comes from my own self! My attitude!

I know what I wanted, but I don't try my best to get it. I have dreams, but I don't take any action to achieve them. 

Then how am I going to know whether those visions in the future will turn out to become what I expected? I don't even do anything to try to make those visions come true. 

Those visions will not come true at all. Not because they are the things that Allah does not intend to make them happen, but it is because I myself do not have the determination to make them happen!

Don't blame Allah or anyone else for this. Most often, the main reason things do not go the way you expected is because you did not do anything, not because it is not meant to be. 

If you don't even intend to plant the tree, then how are you going to reap the fruits? Are you going to keep on dreaming about eating the fruits when in fact there's not even a tree in the first place?

Think Sarah, THINK.

The best thing to do right now is to start planting the tree, to care for it diligently without fail until it had grown tall and could survive on its own. Still, Whether it will bear sweet, fleshy fruits or not, it depends on Allah.

Because remember; 

GO FOR YOUR DREAMS, SARAH! The one major obstacle that you have to overcome is YOURSELF.